i'm the type of person to take it personal

thanks to breathe carolina for the title.
i am at a complete loss as to what i am supposed to do right now. you chose to come back to me. you said that you missed me and you wanted to be with me. yet, things have only been worse since you got back. you said that you were willing to change and to work at things. you've done to complete opposite. you won't even give me the time of day to have a decent conversation with you. i have no idea what is going on in your life right now even though i've tried to ask you. you've made no attempt to find out what is going on in my life.
once again, i had to beg you to give a shit about me the other night. once again, you couldn't respect me when something you wanted was making me uncomfortable. once again, you're ignoring my texts and my calls for no reason at all. you're just choosing to not respond. its pathetic. i tell you that i don't understand why you came back because the way that you treat me is terrible. i say that i deserve better. you say you know. i say that you better start treating me like i actually matter. you say okay. you don't want me to doubt you. but when we've had this conversation a million times, when i have to beg you to treat me decently, then how am i supposed to believe that you mean what you say?
i swear, sometimes it feels like you're trying to make me leave you. i'm beginning to wonder if that is your plan. you're doing all of these things to hurt me just so you can push me away. it may seem ridiculous, but hell, with the way that you have been acting, it's hard to believe that you want to be with me at all. it is impossible to believe that you care about me in any way shape or form.
you said that you came back because you love me. so why don't you fucking act like it? if this is how you show love then you're the worst person on the planet. i've done so much for you. i've changed. i've given you so much. yet, you can't even talk to me much less be there when i need you.
i don't know how many more chances i should give you. i told you last night i was giving up and all you said was don't. so you won't let me give up and you won't give me any reason to stay.
how many more chances should i give you? i want to be with you more than anything. i love you like hell. i care about you. i want to be there for you. i want to be a part of your life. but i can't keep letting you treat me like this. no matter how many times you say you love me. actions speak louder than words.
so either show me that you love me and you care, start backing up all the shit that you say, and treat me like i deserve to be treated, or will leave and i will be gone forever. i don't deserve this. i didn't do anything wrong. i gave you everything and you give me nothing in return.
love it or leave it.